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Conscious Connection

Life is moving way too fast for us. We find ourselves increasingly dysregulated. Over the years, we have accepted new technology that promised us convenience. But its real effect has been disconnection. Information is now available to us at all times; our bosses and coworkers are able to easily contact us outside of the workplace and working hours; social media is oversaturated with stimuli to keep us looking at our screens… It has become more and more of a struggle to actually experience in-person human connection.

This is hardly the fault of the individual – us, the people. The capitalist society and those who profit from it are knowingly isolating us and fuelling our addictions to get us buying more products, or to trick us into doing more work. We might not be responsible for this, but we are the ones suffering from it. We are constantly in “go-mode,” and that has unfortunately become the norm.

Just because this is the norm doesn’t mean we have to accept it. We can instead recognize this fast-paced life and actively choose to defy it. We are ultimately responsible for shaping our own reality, and we can choose to create a reality that is grounded, rooted in what we actually need as humans, not as means of production.

As humans, we yearn for genuine connections yet often settle for instant gratification and numbing distractions because life is simply too demanding, moving too fast, and most of us just want to catch a break. Our energy sources are often left depleted, making it much more challenging to actually put in the effort to form and maintain genuine connections, with others and with ourselves.

This May, our theme is Conscious Connections. We’re diving deeper into our connections with others and with ourselves, exploring different elements such as autonomy, consent, boundaries, presence and intention.

What comes to mind when we think of connection? What about when we feel connection? What does it mean to create connections?

Our connection with ourselves is ultimately the most important. You must nuture yourself first before tending to others. To be connected with yourself means being in touch with your body. What does your body want? What feels good in your body? What are you experiencing through your senses? When we connect with our bodies, we access information and wisdom that we can’t process through the mind – feelings, impulses, and sensations that words can’t describe. We can explore our darkest shadows, our deepest desires, and our most visceral wants and needs. When we integrate these aspects into our whole selves, we can embrace our Authentic Erotic: our highest self.

Although self-connection should be prioritized, connection with others is essential to our health. As humans – as a species -, we need community. We need connection with others. Human touch is a fundamental and primal need in order to feel connected. Yet we are a touch-starved society, especially now after the pandemic. And our society would have us believe that physical closeness and touch must be reserved for romantic and/or sexual partners. This is BS. Touch is only sexual when we make it sexual. Embrace the power of non-sexual touch in your connections with others, and feel the supportive and regulating effects it brings.

Creating and maintaining connections takes time and effort. So make time for them. Make time for yourself – make time to experience things in your body. Make time for others, and be present with them. Put in the work. Turn off the screens. Mute all distractions. Truly focus on the present moment and your present company.

Join us on May 10th for our monthly Ritual, where we will be integrating non-sexual supportive touch in our Conscious Connections and community building. We welcome you to further deepen your understanding of consent in the Intro to Wheel of Consent workshop on May 11th with Sarah Anne. We hope to see you there!